Help us Ron Popeil your our only hope!

Ron Popiel is my favorite pitchman- he is an inventor who knows how to sell his shit- god knows I have enough of it! I have a SHOWTIME Rotisserie oven- it allows me to cook three roasts at one time! and the dehydrator. As a kid i caught big trout with a pocket fisherman. and my mom chopped veggies with a veg-o-matic. So what with John McCain so generously offering up our money to inventors, I thought why not get Ron involved?
He could obviously invent an electric car that would get us not 40, not 50 not 60 not even 70 miles range but 80 miles range with features in it... open the glove box to reveal the glove box fisherman! Imagine a car that is also a rice steamer and cooks roasts, chickens, small turkeys. But Wait! There's more- open the trunk and it is a JUICER! Imagine homemade orange Juice or tomato Juice or low-cal smoothies!What would you pay for a miracle automobile like this... Not $399. not $299. Not even $199- but an amazing $99.99! But order now We'll add a second ronco-mobile for just shipping and processing! Don't wait! Order now!